HEALING: THROUGH COMPASSIONATE ENQUIRY.

Recently, there’s been a natural orientation towards study in the field of trauma-based recovery, through the lens of compassionate enquiry.

Both for my own interest and to support my beautiful clients on the many multidimensional layers we work with. It’s been a really expansive experience. One that is not only enriching and deepening my own personal thesis but also my capacity to support others at deeper levels. An experience that naturally highlights the undeniable necessity and value in being the subject and a student of what you teach.

In truth, I’ve come to know much of the material not through formal study, but in the most personal way, through my own healing journey.

Despite the common misconceptions though, it’s seldom through the intellect that true understanding arises. And, as noble as good intentions alone seem, this too often fails to suffice.

It is instead, one of lived experience, through which we come to be the subject and the product of the teaching.

In this way, I’ve come to appreciate that for learning to become “gnosis” (which could be described as a knowing that has ripened into the marrow of who you are, unshakable because it is lived) for the most part arises out of a felt experience with illumination, revelation, and integration, and therefore is understood by those who have experienced first-hand the power and transformation available through higher love.

By illumination (in context to healing) I mean those moments when light touches what was previously unseen, when something long veiled in shadow is suddenly brought into awareness and the light.

Revelation, on the other hand, is the felt realisation that follows; it is when the meaning of what has been highlighted begins to unfold within you, and for a fleeting moment you not only see it but experience it in all its potentials, often accompanied with a deep sense that “this truth has always been here.”

Integration (as the name suggests) is where that realisation is no longer just a thought or a feeling, it becomes embodied, lived, and allowed to reshape the way we meet the world. When these experiences have taken their natural course, what remains is unshakable gnosis.

Through this lens I’ve come to appreciate, it is, through diligent application and commitment to our newly found truth that we make space for the new seeds to take root across all facets of our life.

And this is without a doubt available to each and every one of us, if we are open to it.

On the subject of trauma, which impacts our human aspects, and therefore our capacity for inner peace and harmony both within and without, this understanding is helpful because: 𝓣𝓻𝓪𝓾𝓶𝓪 𝓲𝓼𝓷’𝓽 𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓵𝓵𝔂 𝓪𝓫𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝔀𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓹𝓮𝓷𝓮𝓭 𝓽𝓸 𝔂𝓸𝓾; 𝓲𝓽’𝓼 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓷𝓪𝓻𝓻𝓸𝔀𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓸𝓯 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝔀𝓸𝓻𝓵𝓭𝓿𝓲𝓮𝔀 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓻𝓮𝓼𝓹𝓸𝓷𝓼𝓮 𝓽𝓸 𝓲𝓽.

That said, it can still be surprising to hear, trauma isn’t simply the “crash-bang” moments etched in our memory (although it can be). Much of our “trauma” is born out of the micro-fractures we experience over time, particularly during our developmental years when we depended on our primary caregivers for safety and survival.

An inbuilt mechanism that is to some degree unavoidable and encoded into our human nature.

In this way it’s not necessarily about having an experience of “abusive primary caregivers” or a “perceived abusive early childhood” (although for some, it can feel and quite literally be that way). It is, actually anything that occurs and causes the recipient to go into a state of permanent contraction. This natural, protective adaptation, once serving us, becomes the very thing that limits our reality now.

For instance, on the topic of adaptations; consider the development of ADD/ADHD which is often experienced as a narrowing of the attention span, sometimes described as a dysregulation of attention (with the paradox of hyperfocus) where being fully present in the moment becomes a challenge. In context to a trauma response, this can be understood as a possible adaptation arising as early as infancy, emerging from extreme discomfort, in an attempt to dissociate; or as a protective reaction to overstimulation or threat that was not met with soothing in the moment.

This highlights that trauma and its associated adaptations, while not always in our conscious awareness, simply find their home inside of us as survival-based mechanisms and most often do not go away until they’re in one way or another harmonised. And although the memory (if we can access it) of its happenings may fade; the feelings, and adaptations in their essence, remain.

Here’s a picture that for me really illustrates this: a story told by a wonderful physician Gabor Maté -

if a person walked up to you and tapped you lightly on the shoulder, would it hurt? Most would likely say no. Yet, what if, beneath your clothing, you had a deep burn on that shoulder, where your skin was no longer protecting the sensitive layers beneath? Would my tap hurt? You might answer yes. Why? Not because the tap was hard, maliciously intended, or forceful, but because there was a deep sensitivity there. Yet, it was always just a tap.

When we are triggered, we are often quick to attribute that blame to the situation or other, shifting attention outward or, for some, spiralling into self-condemnation. Yet the message is the same: the reaction does not match the occurrence. Highlighting there is a wound, and it is not healed.

This type of self-observation isn’t about picking to pieces or looking for issues, that would be pointless, as if a past happening didn’t traumatise you, there won’t be any residue.

And so, compassionate enquiry is really a means to identify it and allows us to heal it, if and only if it arises.

It is true that some seemingly traumatic experiences do not always result in held trauma; it will all depend on how it was handled in the moment and moments near after.

If we were well supported and created strong supportive narratives around it, it can often serve our learning, and our worldview does not narrow. It may even, in some cases, cause us to expand.

Essentially though, for those moments where this did not happen, if we do not address those areas of relevant impact, at least until they fade to the equivalent of a scar (where there is a memory/story without a charge) there will remain places of sensitivity that we adapt ourselves around.

𝓘𝓽 𝓲𝓶𝓹𝓪𝓬𝓽𝓼 𝔀𝓱𝓸 𝔀𝓮 𝓑𝓔.

And so I would offer instead: healing is not simply dredging up the past, but reorienting and freeing ourselves from the limitations that have kept us bound and no longer serve us, so we may live freely in the world as it truly is.

Therefore, acknowledging our pain points becomes an act of liberation, and love, through which we see the ways we narrowed our worldview to cope.

This then gives us access to it, and through compassionate enquiry we learn our wounds are not bigger than us, they are just scary because we do not know what to do with them, which is why they are still hanging around.

So rather than pushing it away or rejecting them we start to loosen there hold on us.

This isn’t about going into agreement or walking around holding our wounds like they are fixed parts of us. We are instead learning to re-parent ourselves 𝓽𝓱𝓻𝓸𝓾𝓰𝓱 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓿𝓮𝓻𝔂 𝓲𝓶𝓹𝓸𝓻𝓽𝓪𝓷𝓽 𝓵𝓮𝓷𝓼 𝓸𝓯 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓱𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓮𝓻 𝓼𝓮𝓵𝓯, and give those parts a new experience, and an opportunity to be liberated from the cages we have built around them.

Yet, if we don’t reclaim the role- we will inevitably carry our wounds into our relationships, communities, and even our systems of power.

𝓐𝓷𝓭 𝓼𝓸, 𝓰𝓸𝓮𝓼 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓼𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 “𝓲𝓯 𝔀𝓮 𝓭𝓸𝓷’𝓽 𝓱𝓮𝓪𝓵 𝔀𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓱𝓾𝓻𝓽 𝓾𝓼, 𝔀𝓮 𝔀𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓲𝓷𝓮𝓿𝓲𝓽𝓪𝓫𝓵𝔂 𝓫𝓵𝓮𝓮𝓭 𝓸𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓼𝓮 𝔀𝓱𝓸 𝓭𝓲𝓭𝓷’𝓽 𝓬𝓾𝓽 𝓾𝓼”

Many of us don’t recognise the ways we express what we needed as a child through our external interactions and relationships.

For someone who feels they were never heard, or neglected, this might express as being overly attentive, caring, or rescuing others in disproportionate ways.

The other swing may be overstating or taking more than we need, to varying degrees of acts of power, where we reclaim it in a disproportionate way.

Sure, both swings of the same coin may give the wounded part temporary relief or control, yet in essence this only glues us to it. This is the opposite of liberation and love.

For the example of the over-giver, it may offer a sense that love is available out there, because you are demonstrating it, which can feel deeply healing to these parts. Yet it can also be a means we re-enact our deepest pain points.

You see, when we rescue someone from their own feelings or situations we take responsibility for what is not ours. Often this causes the recipient to feel held in the moment, and sometimes very grateful. In that way we may feel seen, validated, and kind of heart. This too can feel and be positive, but, if that care is given in disproportionate amounts (and often it is), it becomes greatly limiting for the other’s growth, causing dependency, where we are essentially farming out our need to feel needed in trade for their dependency.

And of course, as typically seen, if the one we over-extend happens to fail to meet our worldview of gratitude and appreciation, it inevitably results in affirming the wound and painting the other as a villain in the story. For some this will sound familiar…

Because the part of you witnessing this sees you giving love to others, but no to yourself, reinforcing the meaning previously made: love exists, but to the exclusion of me.

We come to know that love is out there … we are just not deserving of it.

This is just one example of the many possible ways we can express our inner most wounds by overcompensating for others, or expecting others to do the same, which mearly serves to distract us from what we are really needing: our own love and parenting.

Even if we are consciously unaware of it, we are demonstrating that we are still waiting for a primary caregiver in our partner, our loved ones, or the world to take over the role, rather than simply being it for ourselves.

Yet our partners and people we are in close relationship with are not meant to be our “parents” in the way we needed as children. This is an incredibly difficult and unreasonable standard to hold and of course inevitably sets them up to fail.

A dysfunction that is largely unhelpful to either party.

It’s akin to trying to wipe a spot on your face through the mirror - It of course never works.

This type of dysfunctional behaviour is everywhere we turn, in particular observed in the power struggles we see play out in the world. Many of our leaders are traumatised people who happen to be responsible for making decisions for the greater collective through a narrow lens or worldview.

This is often too where the need for validation, control, and power plays out.

The truth is, collective healing demands leaders who are in right balance. And that requires the demonstration of some degree of self-mastery.

And we too, no matter the degree of our real-world responsibilities, cause our own ripple effect; to which we are responsible.

In this way self responsibility - beginning with self awareness is courageous, and both an act of love and service to others.

Another type of misunderstood trauma is inherited adaptations.

Another story that may illustrate this is an experiment on fleas: where a scientist placed fleas in a jar with a lid on it for an extended period of time. For a while, the fleas jumped at the lid, trying to escape. After a few days, the lid was removed, the flees continued to jump, but none of them jumped beyond the height where the lid had once been.

They had conceded, through prior experience, that it was not possible to get beyond it even when the limitation was removed. What was more illuminating was the offspring inherited the same limitation, having never been exposed to it directly.

This is a learned, generational adaptation.

Many of us are here with inherited programs. And without realising it, we are still living under glass ceilings that no longer exist. In this way, it highlights that to some degree, healing is for everyone, and in fact it’s crucial for the betterment of humanity. And it is deeply humbling to acknowledge and understand that we cannot bypass it.

No amount of perceived plastering over or spiritual bypassing will get you beyond it.

So how then do we begin to heal?

We start by reclaiming our internal parenting dynamics (a relationship that is, and was always ours to take over post-childhood).

And through the lens of compassion, where we work with diligently to establish internal safety — because Love (the true kind) is actually safe and this experience heals. This is not the type of "love" that is outsourced to others in unhealthy ways or the in a passive airy fairy way, but a deeply compassionate, wise, relenting, humbling and uplifting way, the kind that naturally returns you to wholeness through the understanding - this can never be taken: 𝓫𝓮𝓬𝓪𝓾𝓼𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓐𝓡𝓔 𝓲𝓽.

So, it isn’t about wrapping wounded parts in cotton wool or creating barricades around them, or protecting and preserving our wounds, instead it’s about compassionately moving beyond them. In the same way that a wound - even the most severe kind leaves a scar. You may have a story but the wound is no longer open. Some wounds do disappear without a trace and others are a story we tell, yet the no longer control, dictate or limit our lives.

It’s a very real opportunity to step into the quality of self-determination.

Where we learn we always have a choice. We can’t control what happens outside of us, and sometimes even to us, but we can control the way we respond.

We learn that the ability to self-regulate and heal is a super power and one that makes us both safe for ourselves and safe for others we are in relationship with.

Healing is a prerequisite for thriving, through both a spiritual and a non-spiritual lens, and deep down, we come to know it is all the same thing.

It is my experience that 𝓛𝓸𝓿𝓮 can and will reach into all things, because it’s our fundamental nature. And in order to live out of this, we must integrate it into all layers of our beingness.

And naturally, as we experience more of for ourselves in this way, we come to see it is available to all other beings; because we not only naturally begin to see ourselves in others (through an experience of knowing thy self - as within so without) but we get to hold a lantern to a possibility some never imagined possible.

It’s through our own healing we come to deeply know this.

What is possible is far beyond our capacity to grasp or imagine, so instead we learn to be fully here, present in the body, and allow the mystery and joy of living a human life to be the ongoing thesis and ecstatic part of the journey.

Through this lens we come to see that the world doesn’t benefit from more people trying to clean the faces of others, but from our individual integration, and self responsibility. In my view, this is a means through which real change can occur: not through entering into a war with dysfunction, but through recognising our power in it.

Because although history shows that things have very slowly improved with time, when we oppose something, there is always an equal and opposite reaction coming; these are the natural swings.

𝓢𝓸 𝔀𝓱𝓮𝓻𝓮 𝓭𝓸𝓮𝓼 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓵𝓮𝓪𝓿𝓮 𝓾𝓼, 𝓲𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓼 𝓽𝓲𝓶𝓮 𝓸𝓯 𝓪𝓬𝓬𝓮𝓵𝓮𝓻𝓪𝓽𝓮𝓭 𝓬𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓰𝓮?

And ...

𝓗𝓸𝔀 𝓬𝓪𝓷 𝔀𝓮 𝓹𝓻𝓮𝓹𝓪𝓻𝓮 𝓯𝓸𝓻 𝔀𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓲𝓼 𝓽𝓸 𝓬𝓸𝓶𝓮, 𝓽𝓸 𝓱𝓪𝓿𝓮 𝓪 𝓫𝓮𝓽𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓲𝓶𝓹𝓪𝓬𝓽 𝓲𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝔀𝓸𝓻𝓵𝓭?

I would offer only this: first, diligently tend to your own garden, because in doing so, we become better able to spot dysfunction and signs of collective disease within ourselves.

And in this way, if and when we find ourselves in a position of influence, we can attempt to make more discerning choices led by love, wisdom, and clarity: the highest good you can reach for all concerned, rather than an adapted or inherited worldview.

So what to do with darkness, then?

I would say, it is to see darkness, is simply a place devoid of light/love, a place within you or with out, that we have rejected or deemed unpalatable - and so it is, in bringing light back into all of your own inner places, that you see this light is available and can reach into all things.

Make no mistake, it is first an internal job, my friends.

As within, so without.

We most certainly cannot live from or teach what we ourselves have not understood or integrated. And when we really get this, we become humbled by it. A student in an ever-evolving, expanding story where we naturally come to see there are always greater a deeper layers to expand into more compassion and love and it becomes a joy to work with them - because even through the mud, we always become more.

In this way, we begin to see our inner work is the fruits of the ripples flooding outward like a collective contagion and so the question naturally becomes: what will be your offering, through the ripple you leave behind?

~ Jen

The beauty of 𝓘𝓶𝓹𝓮𝓻𝓶𝓪𝓷𝓮𝓷𝓬𝓮.

𝓘𝓶𝓹𝓮𝓻𝓶𝓪𝓷𝓮𝓷𝓬𝓮.

There is a type of peace that arises out of accepting the transient nature of all things. Much like the breath, every inhalation is followed by an exhalation, it cannot be otherwise.

To deny the natural flow of life is to deny life itself. The compulsion to cling or possess is akin to holding one’s metaphorical breath, suffocating the vitality of the moment.

Life’s impermanence invites us to embody gratitude and wonder. Nothing truly belongs to us; everything is merely borrowed for a time. Through our surrender we are able to reach into each moment more fully breathing it all the way in and all the way out, allowing it to move us, change us, and evolve us.

In this way, we come to realise that clinging arises out of our naivety and resistance to change. And in that resistance, we choose to suffer.

Yet there is another way… to LOVE deeply while holding lightly.

~ Jen

Being at cause

𝓒𝓸𝓷𝓿𝓮𝓻𝓼𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷𝓼 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓤𝓷𝓲𝓿𝓮𝓻𝓼𝓮.

Many of life’s occurrences can feel random, yet more often than not, they are not random at all. Much of what we perceive as an unexpected “life quake” or even a “life tsunami” is the culmination of countless micro-actions, and energetic imprints accumulated over time. These actions, though sometimes subtle in their origins, inevitably converge, meeting us like a wave breaking upon the shore.

Whether we are aware of it or not, we exist within a universe governed by the immutable law of cause and effect. Every action, thought, or intention carries an energetic signature, creating ripples in the fabric of time. The energy we emit - whether through deeds, words, or the quiet currents of our inner world, are not lost; but mirrored back to us in equal measure.

This law operates not only in the immediate present but across the vast continuum of time. While we may not always perceive a direct link between a current circumstance and it’s origins, the energy at play often traces back far beyond recent events; sometimes to patterns, choices, or actions from long-forgotten moments or even lifetimes ago.

You see, Energy, by its very nature, is neither created nor destroyed it simply changes form. This fundamental principle, reveals the profound continuity and interconnectedness of all things.

The universe, in its infinite intelligence, holds a memory of all that has been set into motion. What may appear random or unexplainable in the present can often be the result of causes seeded in distant times. A perspective that challenges us to consider life’s events as not isolated occurrences but part of a far greater and intricately woven story - one where every experience offers an opportunity for awareness, growth, and evolution.

It calls on us to dig deep and review our inherent responsibility - not only for that which we set in motion but that which we experiences in turn as a result.

It reminds us that we are less likely to be passive victims of circumstance; rather, we are co-creators of our reality, whether we engage with this truth consciously or allow it to unfold unconsciously.

And far from a concept to Fear, is an invitation that points to the elegance of a much greater design—one that operates with a type of intelligence and purpose which invites us to grow, learn, and evolve.

It’s a profound opportunity to engage with life through a deep, embodied feeling experience, where our emotions, thoughts, and actions don’t govern us but are felt fully through conscious awareness. It is through this embodied presence that we can allow the intelligence to flow through us - to become a catalyst for growth, compassion, wisdom, and love—these sacred qualities are not abstract concepts but living forces that take root in the very fibers of our being, transforming how we respond to the world around and within us.

By embracing this knowing, we become better able to accept and navigate the shifting tides of life - whether it brings joy, sorrow, or something in between - as opposed to being swept away by it.

This understanding is not about detaching from life but instead remaining fully and deeply connected to it whilst accepting its infinite yet transient nature; allowing us to better embrace the full spectrum of this human experience with grace, clarity, and an openness.

In this way, we are have the opportunity to test out the many different flavours of love, the ways it can be brought to any situation, how it can move through us in ways that heal, create, and transform. Life, in its essence, becomes a playground for which love is not just a passive force but an active, engaging force, one that shapes our choices, guides our actions, and radiates outward in ways we may not always immediately recognise.

We begin to sense that something greater than our selves is experiencing itself through us -through the intricate, and at times harrowing, interplay of sorrow, joy, pain and ultimately healing. And through this experience we come to appreciate what it means to be fully human, to be conscious creators of our circumstances, and to feel the weight of our choices in a universe that honors free will.

Ultimately, through the great gift of being here on Earth, we get to experience the full breath of life, to grow, learn and evolve through the culmination of our energetic contributions. We are, after all, students in Earth’s school , and every experience whether challenging or joyful, is an invitation to grow into the highest expression of ourselves.

And we may choose to deny and resist this truth, and perceive ourselves as victims of external forces - to look at life as simply random events; or we can cultivate awareness and become more intentional with the energy we put out and and inevitably contribute to the world.

That choice is ours.

𝓑𝓮 𝓪𝓽 𝓬𝓪𝓾𝓼𝓮.

the simplicity of presence

𝓟𝓻𝓮𝓼𝓮𝓷𝓬𝓮.

There is a bittersweet ache that arises when we truly capture the feeling essence of a moment particularly in nature. The stark beauty of her presence reflects back the absence we often carry in moments dominated by distraction. We postpone being fully alive, waiting for holidays, weekends, or evenings to truly see and feel the world around us. But nature, in her quiet constancy, never waits. She simply is.

We need only sit and be to be reminded of her effortless way of existing, complex yet simple, strong yet yielding. In her presence, we are reminded not just of our interdependence but of our oneness with all life.

There is a peace in that knowing, a peace that dissolves the constant pursuit of “me and mine” which opens to the greater rhythm of life itself. Even if only for a fleeting moment, this awareness shifts something within us and reconnects us with our inherent nature, and capacity for unity, compassion and harmony.

Through nature, if we allow, is the opportunity to be guided back to our inner hearts. And from this place, our impact on the planet becomes softer, kinder, and more aligned with love.

A reminder to allow her all pervasive presence to become an invitation to Pause. Breathe and connect with world around us. There is so much to see and so much to remember through her.

~Jen

The power of breath

𝓑𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓱𝓮.

Throughout the day, there are countless invitations to return to ourselves, to pause, breathe, and reconnect. A single breath, taken with intention, can become a direct doorway to the inner stillness available at the core of our being.

Each inhale has the power to invite and cultivate a sense of inner peace and safety no matter what is unfolding around us. And with each exhale comes the opportunity to consciously release that which has already been.

Simple, yet profoundly powerful.

For me, these moments are a sacred communion. A quiet, inward meeting with the life force that animates my body.

Within the stillness, a natural invitation to open and fully arrive inside of self.

It’s a chance to step beyond noise and distraction into deep receptivity, where inspiration, insight, and truth arise more effortlessly.

A unique opportunity to experience the essence of our own note, our own frequency.

We are, after all, part of the vast symphony (life) - have you ever stopped long enough to feel it?

In these moments, we get to release the need to 𝙨𝙩𝙧𝙞𝙫𝙚 and just 𝙗𝙚 - allowing our natural resonance, the current that we are, to seamlessly ripple outward.

In this way, we simply 𝙚𝙢𝙥𝙩𝙮 - something the best creators understand.

Creativity isn’t about filling ourselves up with what we already know, but about opening to new knowing.

𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓟𝓱𝔂𝓼𝓲𝓸𝓵𝓸𝓰𝔂 𝓸𝓯 𝓟𝓻𝓮𝓼𝓮𝓷𝓬𝓮

On a physiological level, conscious breathing is powerful. It naturally shifts us from overstimulation (fight-or-flight sympathetic state) into a state of rest (rest-and-digest parasympathetic state). With each breath, we activate the body’s natural intelligence, releasing a cascade of beneficial hormones that restore balance to our inner chemistry.

Within us is a powerful, self-regulating pharmacy - one that requires no external remedy to “feel better.”

When we turn inward, we not only trust but remember: the body knows how to harmonise, to heal, to realign. We need only create the space for it to do so.

𝓕𝓲𝓷𝓭𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓨𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓟𝓻𝓪𝓬𝓽𝓲𝓬𝓮 𝓲𝓷 𝓔𝓿𝓮𝓻𝔂𝓭𝓪𝔂 𝓛𝓲𝓯𝓮

Moments of mindfulness, especially in nature, are some of the most powerful ways to cultivate this connection. But presence doesn’t require a specific practice. It is always available to us and can be found in the simplest of moments.

For some, it’s in the quiet of a morning walk. For others, it’s tending a garden, gazing at the ocean, or feeling the warmth of the sun on their skin. I once knew someone who found this space while fishing - it was his meditation, his way of realigning, centering, and simply being.

It’s different for everyone. The key is to discover what brings you back to yourself.

𝓐 𝓖𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓵𝓮 𝓘𝓷𝓿𝓲𝓽𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷

Today, take a moment. Breathe deeply. Allow yourself to notice the life force moving through you and from within you. Notice the space between thoughts, and the stillness that is always there beneath the surface.

Let it be a moment of coming home.

As always - keep loving, shining brightly.

the sacred process of 𝓤𝓷𝓫𝓮𝓬𝓸𝓶𝓲𝓷𝓰.

We will all face moments of 𝓤𝓷𝓫𝓮𝓬𝓸𝓶𝓲𝓷𝓰.

Where the familiar begins to crumble,

where the edges of who you’ve been dissolve into something unrecognisable.

Where we can no longer see where we end and where we begin.

Where the path ahead is unlit, unclear and all we have is trust.

In these moments, we find ourselves burdened with two choices:

To willingly 𝓼𝓾𝓻𝓻𝓮𝓷𝓭𝓮𝓻…

Or to resist, clinging to hold life in place,

as if 𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗹𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀 could preserve us,

as if 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭 could protect us.

Yet deep in the 𝗽𝗶𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗯𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 is a knowing

that nothing in the natural world can remain unchanged.

Even a seed, safe within its shell, must surrender to cracking

open before it can take root.

It must then push through resistance to reach the light.

Not because it is defective.

But because it was always destined to 𝓾𝓷𝓫𝓮𝓬𝓸𝓶𝓮.

And so are 𝔂𝓸𝓾.

Our suffering was never a prerequisite for transformation.

It is only born of grasping, resisting, holding on

a final attempt to oppose a river that is already flowing.

Yet a river 𝗰𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗯𝗲 𝗳𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵𝘁.

A river 𝗰𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗯𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗮𝗶𝗻𝗲𝗱.

It can only be met

with the quiet knowing that life is always moving us forward,

even when we cannot yet see where it is taking us.

We can choose to drown in it

or to swim.

It was never meant to be perfect.

And not every moment was meant to be understood.

Life does not pause for us.

It is happening in all moments, through us, and all around us

whether we resist it or fight it.

Every soul we will ever encounter will stand at the edge of themselves,

feeling the weight of their own baggage and untruth.

We are not alone in the 𝘂𝗻𝗯𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗴.

A journey we all take - one that was never meant to isolate us, but unite us.

Yet in our amnesia, we came to know ourselves as separate notes, scattered through time.

Believing we are not chords in the same symphony

where each note playing its part,

each sounding its key.

Deep within, we each carry the same longing to remember

what we were always meant to be.

We confused the journey with chasing happiness.

But the destination was always to 𝓪𝔀𝓪𝓴𝓮𝓷.

To remember the 𝓽𝓻𝓾𝓽𝓱

We thought that peace was found in commanding the tides,

rather than in our steadiness within them.

We thought it was found in perfection

not in our willingness to be 𝓹𝓻𝓮𝓼𝓮𝓷𝓽 for all of it

The messiness, the breaking, the mending, the undoing, the unbecoming.

All this time, we needed only to allow life itself to shape us.

move us, refine us, dissolve us,

until all that remains is the essence of what we truly are.

And in that essence…

We realise we have always been right here

We only needed the 𝓮𝔂𝓮𝓼 𝓽𝓸 𝓼𝓮𝓮.

So 𝓼𝓾𝓻𝓻𝓮𝓷𝓭𝓮𝓻.

Let the old fall away.

Let the fire burn.

Let the wave take what it must.

Not because you are broken.

Not because you are lost.

𝓑𝓾𝓽 𝓫𝓮𝓬𝓪𝓾𝓼𝓮 𝔀𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓻𝓮𝓶𝓪𝓲𝓷𝓼 𝓲𝓼

𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓽𝓻𝓾𝓽𝓱 𝓸𝓯 𝔀𝓱𝓸 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓽𝓻𝓾𝓵𝔂 𝓪𝓻𝓮.

It’s time to remember.

Keep loving & shining brightly.

Jen

Artist Vanessa Horabuena

why reclaim our feeling nature ?

“The heart feels what the eyes cannot see and knows what the mind cannot understand”

Developing and reclaiming our feeling nature gives us the capacity to detect truth energy and therefore sense what is and is not congruent with it.

We can begin to develop our intuition aka “feeling nature” by first acknowledging & recognising we are not our thoughts.

Over identification with thought is really a distraction and signpost of a much deeper disconnection with self & our higher identification/knowing, and even deeper than that a form of self-rejection.

Feelings are the eyes of the heart, when we are aligned to love and deeply connected to all that we are (the radiant soul) there is a knowing, a true north & internal compass.

So often in this life we are encouraged to think about everything, how often do you find yourself saying let me think about it” vs let me FEEL into it?

Perhaps it’s because we don’t trust the feeling nature, we may have confused feeling with identifying with our limiting beliefs and emotions - our very valid yet subjective experience, not to be confused with the truth.

There is a saying “if it’s not love, it’s not the truth” allow yourself for a moment to feel that.

If we really break it down, there are really only two frequencies - love or fear.

Our feeling nature gives us the capacity to FEEL truth energy (LOVE) and detect what is congruent with it and what is not.

From this awareness and knowing we are not only able to run this filter across our interactions with others/life itself but that of ourselves, to feel what is happening within our own experience, and get a sense of what we are feeling and experiencing beyond the words or perceived phenomena on the ground.

It’s not about judgment it’s a type of curiosity. What is that I’m feeling?

An opening/invitation to step in, a willingness to surrender to becoming self-aware. From here we can choose to actively clear out what is not us to connect with the greater essence that we are.

We are all energetic beings and just as the sugar in the water is, we may not see it, we simply experience it.

~ Jen

Why the truth will set you free but first it will shatter your illusions

The path to authenticity - to truly 𝓴𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓽𝓱𝔂 𝓼𝓮𝓵𝓯 is more often than not forged through a transformational fire.

An alchemical process that can only begin to take place through our willingness to know and accept the truth.

Without truth there is stagnation. We cannot grow or learn.

To be an authentic and sovereign being is to know thy self. Which begins with our capacity to accept ourselves exactly as it is and exactly as we are.

In this way the Truth is directly linked in with our humility, we acknowledge both our strengths and shortcomings without projecting at it or judging it. We acknowledge how far we have come and how far we have to go, creating a steady foundation to truly grow, learn and evolve.

Through truth comes the opportunity to peel away the masks, false layers of self to uncover more of who and what we truly are.

We inevitably reveal the hidden jewels, gifts that lie within, and in this way we become linked in with more of who we truly are at the core.

Through truth comes the magnificent opportunity to shine our bright lights into the world giving permission for others to do the same.

It is therefore for the most part through our unbecoming that we inevitably become. We must not fear the fire .

𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓭𝓮𝓰𝓻𝓮𝓮 𝓲𝓷 𝔀𝓱𝓲𝓬𝓱 𝓪 𝓹𝓮𝓻𝓼𝓸𝓷 𝓬𝓪𝓷 𝓰𝓻𝓸𝔀 𝓲𝓼 𝓲𝓷 𝓭𝓲𝓻𝓮𝓬𝓽 𝓹𝓻𝓸𝓹𝓸𝓻𝓽𝓲𝓸𝓷 𝓽𝓸 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓪𝓶𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓽 𝓸𝓯 𝓽𝓻𝓾𝓽𝓱 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝔂 𝓬𝓪𝓷 𝓪𝓬𝓬𝓮𝓹𝓽 𝓪𝓫𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓶𝓼𝓮𝓵𝓿𝓮𝓼 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓽 𝓻𝓾𝓷𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓪𝔀𝓪𝔂 - 𝓛𝓮𝓵𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓥𝓪𝓵 𝓥𝓪𝓷 𝓭𝓮 𝓦𝓪𝓵𝓵

Keep loving and shining brightly

-Jen

boundaries

“𝘽𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙙𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙨 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙙𝙞𝙨𝙩𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙖𝙩 𝙬𝙝𝙞𝙘𝙝 𝙄 𝙘𝙖𝙣 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙢𝙚 𝙨𝙞𝙢𝙪𝙡𝙩𝙖𝙣𝙚𝙤𝙪𝙨𝙡𝙮” ~ 𝙋𝙧𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙨 𝙃𝙚𝙢𝙥𝙝𝙞𝙡𝙡

𝘐𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘢𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘴 𝘥𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘭𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘤𝘩 𝘸𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘷𝘦𝘴, 𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦.

𝘋𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺’𝘴 𝘸𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘷𝘦𝘴, 𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘥𝘴/𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢 𝘣𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘺𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘪𝘴𝘯’𝘵 𝘢 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘰𝘧 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘤𝘰𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘥𝘪𝘤𝘦.

𝘓𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘪𝘯 …

𝘐𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘶𝘱 𝘸𝘦 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘮𝘱𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘴𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘣𝘦.

𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘢 𝘴𝘢𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 “𝙒𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙬𝙚 𝙠𝙣𝙤𝙬 𝙗𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙧, 𝙬𝙚 𝙙𝙤 𝙗𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙧”. 𝘐𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺, 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘥𝘦𝘭 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧-𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧-𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘸𝘦 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦.

𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘢𝘯 𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 & 𝘮𝘶𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘵, 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘮𝘱𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘥𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵.

𝘞𝘦 𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘶𝘯𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘦 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘮𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘰𝘧 “𝘨𝘰𝘥 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘧𝘧” (𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘕𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘴𝘵𝘦 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦 - 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘤𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘦, 𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘵𝘴 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘤𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶) 𝘸𝘦 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘢𝘴 𝘢 𝙎𝙤𝙪𝙡 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝙎𝙤𝙪𝙡 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘴 𝘪𝘵𝘴 𝘥𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘺.

𝙏𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙞𝙨 𝙖𝙡𝙬𝙖𝙮𝙨 𝙖 𝙗𝙚𝙩𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙬𝙖𝙮. 𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨.

𝘚𝘵𝘢𝘺 𝘣𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 & 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨.

𝘑𝘦𝘯

Why work with a coach?

In my experience working with a coach/mentor is a deeply rewarding experience. One that offers an immensely supportive space to unravel & weed out self imposed limitations and limiting beliefs that we may or may not be conscious of.

It provides an opportunity to be held in a space of unconditional love and acceptance (something we often withhold for ourselves) where we are heard, and championed in reaching out brightest and clearest potential.

The best coaches, mentors and teachers I’ve come across have access to coaches,mentors and teachers a few steps ahead. Nobody is just there, we are in a constant state of evolution in the spirit of the cycles of growth and learning.

And certainly a key ingredient being led by ones who have forged the path ahead.

This life (Earth School) can be tricky, in many ways deeply challenging to forge alone. We may have limiting beliefs around it being safer to go at it alone (lone wolf syndrome) or the other swing, giving someone else the responsibility over our sovereignty, both unbalanced types of pendulum swings. At the core both about a deep lack of trust within self.

When you work with me, I’ll offer you a safe, judgment free space to review how life or aspects of your life are going for you. Creating an opening and opportunity to evaluate where there may be the necessity for new ways of thinking/being. The modalities and tools I offer are grounded and not only support and accelerate your personal growth but support you along your journey of self actualisation & evolution.

I truly believe each of us has the capacity to heal ourselves, we do not need to go to a “healer” for the answers, we are our own healers.

Everything you seek is within you. Let me show you the way.

𝓔𝔁𝓹𝓵𝓸𝓻𝓮 𝓨𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓟𝓸𝓽𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓲𝓪𝓵

Join our weekly class Breathing Space Freo Monday nights or work with me 1-1

why time WON'T heal all wounds.

We’ve all heard the saying “𝐓𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝𝐬” and I’m sure at some point or another experienced the relief that comes with “time”.

Yet, unless we are fully 𝐅𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐇𝐚𝐫𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐢𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 our experiences, at a much deeper level those wounds often make a home deep inside our unconscious being. Showing up more often than not through our patterns & behaviours.

Experiencing being “𝐭𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐠𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐝” can give you a direct line into an old wound. Even deeper than that, you may be able to get a sense for the self imposed “𝐥𝐢𝐦𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐟𝐬 and “𝐠𝐥𝐚𝐬𝐬 𝐜𝐞𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬” we imposed upon ourselves and the world as a result of those experiences.

Most of the time these imprints appear dormant, yet behave more like energetic magnets, attracting in experiences that mirror the internal disharmony. Another consequence being, we tend to bring ourselves to life guarded and unable to greet our experiences or the world a-new, thus limiting our capacity to tune into the natural flows of life and who we truly are.

But what if we could 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐮𝐬 𝐡𝐨𝐦𝐞? rather than building a fortress around the wounded parts. What if we chose to invite and allow the full expression of all those feelings - all the way through?

What if our natural state was to experience all of it? The broad spectrum of this very human experience, the pain, pleasure and everything in-between.

How would it be to find 𝐬𝐚𝐟𝐞𝐭𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 to do this, to fully participate in life and as a consequence move with the ebbs and flows of life in a limitless way. Where we are 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐭, 𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟-𝐬𝐮𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 and 𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐝𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 all in one, and are able to cultivate a space of deep intimacy and authenticity within self.

Could you imagine such a place? a safe container to do this for ourselves.

If the potential excites you, I invite you to step in.

Why? 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐥𝐝 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐬 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐰!

respecting our phases.

Despite much of our conditioning, the cycles of growth and learning (evolution) is not linear, we will cycle and spiral through many deaths and rebirths throughout time. Few of us educated on the cycles of nature, the deterioration and regeneration witnessed across all of life, not much different to the grief and elation experienced through the process of alchemising wounds.

Many ancient civilisations understood the cyclical nature of things. Accepting & melding with its natural rhythms and flows, the wanes and waxes of the moon, the shedding and regenerating of all life, and winters that inevitably move into Spring. They understood that every ascent begins with a descent, this message encoded in ancient stories and mythologies.

In todays world many of us are obsessed with one directional ascension, be it through constant achievement and progress in the material world or spiritually through the denial of the murkiness in our inner worlds, wanting to ascend out of the human experience, it’s no wonder we have parts that feel lost, fearful, broken, unworthy, unlovable, and even insane when entering the initiation of descent. The irony being, much of our potential and wisdom is born our intimacy with our deepest pain.

Our ascension (experienced as descension - spirit into matter) does not happen through denying our wounding or intense emotions. It happens through meeting it. Through loving the most fragmented, broken, shattered pieces of ourselves back into wholeness to reveal our true nature. We come to know that much of our light lives in the depths of the avoided and denied parts and if our intentions are to liberate it, we will have to trade our comfort for courage to confront our densest most vulnerable places.

If you are entering a next cycle, take heed in knowing through each phase comes the opportunity for rebirth. That’s the nature of things, it’s simply how we evolve. We can choose to embrace it or fight against its natural currents.

The choice is always ours.

Inspired by Camille W.

~ Jen

the universe is constantly providing us with opportUNITIES TO learn, grow and evolve.

In moments of challenge it can be easy loose sight of the bigger picture.

Yet, Life itself is always conspiring to move us towards growth and evolution. This is the very way of nature, you only have to venture into our forests to see it in action. There is always new growth, death and rebirth, without these flows nature itself would seize to exist and hence would we.

The experience of not getting what we think we want for example, can often be our greatest opportunities to welcome in new learning and growth.

Growth is often ( not always but often ) born out of the mud and our capacity to engage in deep self reflection and enquiry..

What can I learn here?

What opportunities are presenting to grow, review or even un become?

What is the universal mirror reflecting back to me? - is the outer world reflecting my inner world ?

For instance do I have beliefs around ? [insert chosen belief] and is the universe reflecting that back to me through experiences?

If so, how can work with these reflections to harmonise/heal and make space for a new experience?

Or on the flip side could there be something greater waiting for me that I cannot yet see? and can I simply surrender to that ?

This is all about being open to the opportunities that are presenting to grow, learn or even un become which is also governed by our capacity and openness to receive feedback through the universal mirror.

The magnitude of these experiences often escapes us. Resulting in overlooking the hidden gifts, gems on offer.

Our “superpower” lies in our capacity to both respond (as opposed to react) and surrender to the flows and currents of life itself; and all part of this wonderous existence within a benevolent universe, where learning, growth and evolution lie at its centre.

Keep loving & shining brightly

-Jen